I'm going to start writing poetry again. I used to for�a long time. I'm hoping it will be as therapeutic as it used to be. Well here is one that� I wrote a few days ago. It doesn't really have a name.
No, Everything is not okay
Everytime night turns to day
I pray
"God let me die today."
I can't change the way I feel
People are trying with just a little pill
It all just makes me want to blurt
"God, stop making me hurt."
I know I have Jesus in my heart
Which means we'll never part
But I just don't feel him with me
Maybe they lied and he really left me.
God, if you left me, hear my cry
Please come back before I try
To take something that isn't mine
To take my life one last time.
I need some feedback, Please.� That is, if you want to. I can be short or long. You can tell me it sucks if you want to. Just give me something to work with.
Wow my parents are awful, this morning it was go ahead and get your laptop for college and this evening it is i dont want to spend any more money on computers what's your problem! What's all that about!!! Now thanks to her not wanting to spend money i can't afford to go to college till next year! Way to go mom! make me never graduate and annoy me to the point of going insane.... i am so stressed out between babysitting,working, cleaning, running the house,and trying to get in a couple of hours of study� i can't take it anymore. and on top of it all she won't allow me to move out or get a college loan! This is total cabin fever like. I don't know what i'm going to do about it all.... I mean what do i do? i'm cornered in awful cercumstances� with no way out in site. Plus living in this house and sharing a bedroom with everyone is driving me nuts! Well maybe i'll elaborate on this subject later but right now i need to let off some steam....
美丽的哀愁---上海态度
�
� 4月中旬恐怕是上海一年中相对的好气候, 不太冷也不太热又没风, 在这个季节人的血管松驰了, 肌肉舒展了, 心里透亮了. 四月是上海人一年中最有可能呈现美丽笑容的季节.�
� 小时候看过一本书叫 ‘上海的早晨’,� 书的封面是烟雾蒙蒙的上海. 来到上海后真是感到这本书的书名和封面都选得好, 表现了大上海雾气都市的含蓄和骨子里对明媚的艳阳的渴望. 大城市不是没有艳阳天, 只是生活在大城市里的人有心思欣赏艳阳天的时候不多.
� 如今上海的天不再透明, 总是笼罩在一片时浓时淡的烟雾里, 汽车尾气和降尘加上华丽的现代建筑产生灰色朦胧的效果. 也成就了这大都市美丽的哀愁. 如果我写书, 书名就叫 ‘上海的灰雾’ . 我们都知道是物质文明的灯塔引导我们走进了烟雾缭绕的巷子.
Meu Deus. How horrible-I fell asleep at 11 (which is the equivalent of 3 am for any normal person) and then woke up at 6. Fell asleep reading. Woke up and picked up the book and started again.
I finished the book, last night.�Not bad, but not good enough to throw myself off a cliff after, as some of the girls in my class seem to think. Remind me to thank a helpful girl whose name will, for my purposes, be Emily, who managed to wrench my hands off the copy of the book that belongs to the school library (and, I might add, was not borrowed in my name). Emily (lovely girl that she is) saw my despair at having the book (any book) taken from me when I had already started it, and lent me her copy. THANK YOU! Not that you ever will see this, much less know it was me, but since I didn't have much time to thank you then....
Lovely and rainy. I loooooove the rain. I really needed it. No, I am not depressed. Maybe depressING, a little ; ), but not depressed. I love, love, love the rain. It is so peaceful, and peace is as necessary for me as food or sleep or books. I am by no means an extrovert.
Well, I am going to go now. Chores, chores, chores, homework, PROJECTS, reading, reading, reading, reading, reading, chores. So much to do.
Book suggestion of the day: Goose Girl and sequels, by Shannon Hale. YA fiction/fantasy. Enjoy!
~Annabel
I have been in a high state of excitement pretty well all day.
Not only are there multiple books and movies made out of books that I am highly anticipating, but my friend will drop off the sequel to Twilight sometime tomorrow. Hopefully late in the day, because otherwise it will be impossible for me to resist reading. It's this way for nearly any sequel to any book I've read. Sigh.
So, for anyone who cares about this (the equivalent of no one�), here are the books/ movies I am waiting for. In no particular order (b=book, m=movie):
Aha! There is my lust list. All highly anticipated, and some not coming until next year :(. Ah well. Patience is key.
If only I had the slightest bit of it.
Oh, wow.
Guess what day it was at school today, after my prolonged rant about my work-related�predicament? Career day! Hooray for missing all morning classes! Some of the presentations were really good. Interesting, all of it. There was an authour there too! I went up to her and talked to her for�a while about writing. She was very nice. I have decided that I will write, no matter whether my parents support me or not. Clearly I will have a job on the side, but I will write as well.
Due to immensely intense stress caused by peer pressure, I have started (and nearly finished) reading Twilight. Don't know if you've heard of it, but�I won't explain it here. It's ok, I guess, for a romance. A bit overdone at times, but I will finish it (unless the book is unfit for anything but recycling, I find it tasteless to either A) not finish a book, or B) read the ending first.). My tolerance for romance is rather low, but besides that it is a pretty good story. Of course, the romance is pretty well the main theme, but I try to ignore it.
This entry will be relatively short so that I can finish the book and thus shut Charlotte up
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